My marriage…with Basketmouth

Basketmouth

How long have you been married?

Now, it’s 11 years.

How did you meet your wife?

I was promoting a show, that’s my first show back then, in Lagos and I went to the University of Lagos to promote it, then I shared my flyers myself. I was in one of the hostels when I saw her pass by. I walked up to her and we had a conversation. I asked for her contact and she gave me a fake number. I tried calling the number, it was some other guy that picked it up and was mad. I went back to that same spot, I can’t remember how many days I kept going back there before I saw her pass by. I approached her again and got the correct number. (Laughs).

Actually, I called her (after I got the correct number) and she wasn’t receptive so I stopped calling and deleted the number. Then some months later, I bumped into her when she was with her friends and I approached her and collected her number again. That was the last time I collected the number because she was stubborn and I don’t have time for stubborn girls (laughs). I like the fact that she was who she was.

Was it love at first sight for you?

I won’t call it love at first sight but I just had a feeling that she was the one for me. I had never walked up to a woman in my entire life like that before then. She was the first person I actually walked up to and asked for her number.

How has the marital journey been?

It’s been amazing. We can only thank God.

We are now like siblings. (Laughs).

Can you still remember how your wedding day was?

We had a lot of planning and re-timing but we brought in an event company for the planning, No Surprises and I think they did an amazing job. I also brought in my event company to help assist with logistics. In terms of the pressure most grooms face, I didn’t feel that much. I had time to go out with my friends, drink, eat, dance and gossip. It was fun, the whole experience itself was dope and I’ll pay anything to relive the moment.

How have you been able to strike a balance between your career and family?

The good thing is that I don’t club. I don’t just hang out unnecessarily unless it is an event. It is rare for you to just see me out like that so that’s the time I spend at home. I try as much as possible to create a 50-50 balance with my work and family. The way it is now, I can create or direct people to do the work from the comfort of my room except they need me. Most importantly, my scheduling is very tight as in, very well organised. There are times when it seems difficult to achieve a balance but I try to make it work.

What is your advice to those preparing to embark on marital journey?

When you find someone you love, you will know in your heart. Try as much as possible not to be forced into marriage, like, do it for the right reasons, do it for yourself because what you are entering into is forever. No good marriage ends up in divorce. You need to have a good marriage so it doesn’t end in divorce and that means you are getting married to someone that understands and is patient with you. Let respect for each other be mutual. What you can’t take now, contain it now. If you know you will not be able to deal with it later, don’t do it. Once you are stepping in, look at the things you know you can really deal with if you don’t and you become married, those are the things that will later haunt you. It is best to contain them before you step in.

The way I see it, once you meet a woman that is 20, 25 years old, she is already defined, she is complete so you can’t just come and think you will change her in three years, it’s impossible. So for the men that are thinking that way, you can’t just change a lady that way. You have to be able to adapt and if it is something that will hurt you, well, that’s your choice. But why will you want to step into something that will hurt you forever? Compatibility is important as well. Your woman has to be a reflection of you.